Rating: ⁷⁄₁₀ Read: 2016.08.16

Mark Manson is a well-known blogger, with the tipically included headlines like “bestselling author” or “As seen on here and there”. Reading a lot about self-help scene for years, I was inclined to think this book is the same happinness bullshit. However I’ve chosen to read this book due to the good review of Derek Sivers who I highly admire, and I was not disappointed after the book fortunately.

Here are some random notes I thought is important:

We are defined by what we choose to reject. If we reject nothing, we essentially have no identity at all

People in strong relationships will take responsibility for their own values and problems, not their partners.

The true measurement of self-worth is not how a person feels about her positive experiences, but rather how she feels about the negative ones.

I did not like to climb much. I just liked to imagine the summit.

If you give too many fucks about trivial shit (ex fb’s, etc) do not have much going on in your lifeto give a legitimate fuck about. (Finding something important to care about is a must).

Not giving a fuck means being comfortable with being different.

The desire for more positive experience is istelf negative, acceptance of one’s negative experience is itself positive experience.

No truly happy person feels the need to stand in front of a mirror and recite that he is happy.

Your problems are actually not privileged in their pain, that is the first and most important step towards solving them.

Prioritizing better vaules, choosing better things to give a fuck about. Because when you give better fucks, you get better problems. And when you get better problems, you get a better life.

Choose to measure yourself not as a rising star or an undiscovered genius. Measure yourself by more mundane identites. Student, partner, friend.

It’s worth remembering that for any change to happen in your life, you must be wrong about something. If you’re sitting there miserable, you’re already wrong something major in your life, and until you’re able to question yourself to find it, nothing will change.

The good value is an ongoing, lifelong process that defies completion.

Depth is where the gold is buried. You have to stay committed to something and go deep to dig it up. That’s true in relationships, in career, in building a great lifestyle.

How’d the relationship change If I refused? (Stay away of hidden conditions)

Commitment gives freedom, makes decision making easier, and removes fear-of-missing-out. It allows you to focus intuitively on a few highly important goals.